My life has become so dull it's almost unbearable. I was looking forward to school ending so desperately and now all I want is to go back. At least it gave me something to wake up for. Why is it, at a time like this, that everything must be turned upside down? Right now I should be rejoicing my completion of school, not longing for more. I should be busy preparing for my graduation party. But I can't muster up the energy. I should be very excited that my eighteenth birthday is so soon. But I'm not. It's not much to look forward to anymore. I was verrrrrrrrrry much looking forward to moving to St Petersburg and now I'm having hesitant feelings about that. Why? Like I said, everything feels like it's been turned upside down and dumped on top of me. I can't handle this. Yesterday, I got out of bed for maybe four hours. And those four hours were a disaster... I would've been better off in bed. That is very unlike me. I don't like sleeping so much, but I wish I could sleep through today and tomorrow, maybe longer. For a month or two I felt invincible, but I don't believe anymore. It's sad. I'm sad, if you haven't caught on yet. Summertime blues?